Posts Tagged ‘tinder’


March 1, 2016

For the last few weeks I’ve been hanging out with my neighbor more and more. He…

is 32 years old

has a college degree and works in GIS

has a broken back… seriously… he walks with a cane

He has curly hair that he doesn’t bother taming – which i kind of think is adorable.

is a recovering fat kid (like me!)

is completely sarcastic

420 friendly (i mean, if i had a broken back i’d do this instead of narcotics too!)

is constantly complaining about his love life or lack thereof

It doesn’t come across as if he wants anything but friendship from me… which I find a perk since his front door is probably a total of 4 feet from mine. Talk about impending disaster, right?!

So anyway, lately the topic of his dating comes up more and more. He is online dating and feels like he has only found a few crazy girls to go out with a few times in the last year. And poor guy, his friends with benefits just cut off the benefits!

We are completely too honest with each other and have shared entirely too much about our lives, love lives, and sex lives.

As I was heading home from my workout yesterday the sunset was incredible. I’m so lucky to live right on the river. Sunset plus water equals beauty everytime. So I texted him when I got home, grabbed my camera, and invited him for a ride in my new Jeep. I didn’t tell him my plans, but after an acceptable amount of showing off my car driving, I pulled into the parking lot across the street on the river, told him to get out, and started snapping pictures. My plan was to give him completely new pics for his online profiles that I planned on revamping ASAP!

I basically had to threaten him to get out of my car, but because of my winning persistent personality along with a few curse words, he went with it.

So, when we got back I asked him if he wanted white or red and told him I’m crashing his apartment for the evening. I had so much fun revamping all his profiles. Rewriting all his bios. And picking new pics for him along with the new ones I just took, which came out great by the way!

Anyway. It was fun. I’m crossing my fingers!

looking back at R

September 9, 2015

Let me hit the pause button on Sir T really fast and explain a few things:

A few months before M and I started dating I was dating this guy. I didn’t write about him other than our first date… and a little vague tid bit at the bottom of this blog post and this one. I couldn’t write about him because in a moment of this-guy-really-cares-for-me-and-i-can-open-up-to-him I gave him my blog. Him and my sister are the only readers I’m not anonymous to. Anyway, I’ve been wanting to write about him for awhile now.

After our first date we didn’t see each other again for a full month. But I knew that I wanted a second date with him. I can’t really remember why it took so long… but this was during my Tinder phase so I could see how the meaningless distractions might have won out there. When you are stuck in the Tinder muck you forget what quality is because it’s so quantity based. Bleh. It’s like quick sand. Anyway…

I started seeing R on a semi regular basis. We live about 60 miles apart so it wasn’t the most convenient thing. On top of that his working hours were the opposite of mine most days. Our only common free time was Wednesday evenings, Saturday nights (post 10pm), and Sundays. This kind of schedule was working for us. I was busy. He was busy. I got to keep my social calendar. He got to…. whatever he did. But as we got closer and closer and I realized “Holy shit I think I WANT to commit to this guy” (which is a big deal because its the first time I’ve felt this since my divorce)… our schedules became too inconventient. I wanted more time with him. I wanted more. I no longer wanted casual… I wanted exclusivity. Between my on-call schedule and a few extra shifts he picked up through the week it didn’t work out. But it was one of those haunting “what-if” break ups because it was a scheduling issue, not a matter of the heart.

We still check in with each other about once a month through text. At one point we said we missed each other, but that’s where we would leave it. Then M came along. I truly feel like after me and R I was finally ready for something more than casual. So with M I jumped in full force. Poor guy didn’t stand a chance. He wasn’t where I was… I was the one that had primer already painted on. That lasted a month… a good month… but only a month. Still, I was so ready that this break up took me down. 2 months later I feel good tho. Recovered (mostly).

BUT ANYWAY! The point of this whole blog post:

On my second date with R… which was just hanging out in my apartment on opposite sides of the couch… I thought “I can see myself loving this guy.” I just said LOVE in my head on a second ‘date’! WHAT?! I just tucked that thought away. I didn’t hate the thought. Then as the night continued… still on opposite sides of the couch we started discussing the movie I had just seen with my girlfriends – 50 Shades of Grey. Now, I think that all of us in the life style have a soapbox especially made for this series, but I held my tongue because it’s hard not to get worked up about that movie and stay undercover. Welp, he didn’t stay undercover. He outed himself… He identifies as a Dom… WHAT?!?!?!? I STILL don’t say anything explicit about my submissive tendencies, but I join in the conversation enough to hopefully give off the hint. He’s not the kind of guy to tell people this. This is just how well we hit it off. This was our second 4 plus hour conversation and we were clicking in all the right places. Hell, I had the L word on the brain!

So over the next few months we had (although very limited contact) some very satisfying on every level contact. In the bedroom… a-freaking-mazing. He was dom. I was sub. I was his. And he was so fucking satisfying. I can’t get over how perfect it really was. Our kinks matched up so perfectly. He was so good at it. The trust I felt was beyond logic. Outside of the bedroom our conversations were constant and interesting. We couldn’t really get enough… which is where we started falling apart… Wanted more of everything. We would go weeks without being able to get to each other and it was torture. I would miss him so badly. Neither one of us fought hard enough to continue through that torture. But breaking it off with him was almost too easy. It was as if we hit an understood pause button… We never said it out loud, but this is how I felt. And I let life distract me. M came along and made it all the more easy.

Relevance to now??

He makes this whole dom search so hard. I can’t imagine anyone being able to recreate what R did for me emotionally and physically. Even in just the few scenes I’ve had with a few other people, while I do enjoy being a whipping post, there is this whole other level that I’ll never be able to get because R set that bar so damn high. Post scene flashbacks… with him… haunting. Every time someone contacts me about getting to know me on fetlife, I can’t help but think of R. I’m haunted by him.


August 18, 2015

I’m so dissatisfied right now. Had a binge eating session last night. Emotional hangover from that today. Guilt. Shame. The whole deal.

Job: I feel useless. There are rare day where I feel needed. But as the newest member of the team… I’m pretty disposable right now. I miss my old position where I was actually good at it. I kicked ass. Now, I’m a baby again… needing to be spoon fed everything it seems.

relationship status: I loved being apart of a couple with M. I miss him. I miss that. And now… I’m just all over the place, once again. Too many options and too many directions. At this point I can drop them all and be just as dissatisfied in life. I was in communication with 4 guys just last night between the hours of 9 and 11 and really only 1 that I’d care to actually be with, of course, he’s the least likely of the 4 because of time and distance. I need a good flogging. Gah, I want that. NEED that. A good flogging and a good after-care cuddle sesh.

Workouts: My damn motivation changes from week to week and its really bugging me. I signed up for the gauntlet and i’m pretty much dreading every obstacle right now. I have exactly a month to get ready for it. Gonna be stupid… I’ll walk away feeling terrible about myself. I hope I’m wrong about this. Overall I’m doing well. I even lost 10 pounds in the last 2 months that feels pretty damn good. But… like I said, every week feels different.

Restless: I need a vacation in the biggest way possible. But vacationing alone? I don’t know that I’m a good enough person to be able to do that and not cry myself to sleep every night, or pick up some rando at the closest bar to my hotel where ever I go. Reckless. Purely reckless. And I’ll still be just as dissatisfied, but also gain a side of disgust. I’ve even thought about getting back on tinder JUST to find a vacation buddy… how pathetic is that. “Need vacation buddy for one week in September. Series inquiries only”. I’M PATHETIC!

I just wanna throw the biggest pity party today.

bad day bad day bad day

It’ll pass.

a tinder’s end

March 13, 2015

After 3 weeks of being on Tinder I couldn’t take it any more. I told myself that I was going to stay in Tinder but stop swiping. “Just weed out the ones you have, chick. You got too many.” But I was beyond hope. I was addicted. The One could be the next one. Oh! He’s cute! But look at him!!!! Each swipe brought a new hope. Of course then you get that message “Can I get your number?” Crap. reality hits. and you realize this is the 5th person just today that you have given your number to. yikes. And in your phone it looks like this “ryan tinder” “ryan cutoff tuxedo shirt tinder” “kyle tinder” and so on.So not only do you have 10 people texting you (or more) but you have new matches popping up by the second. At some point you just have to know when is when and claim your life back. So. I never logged back on again. I’m still out there somewhere. But I haven’t even down loaded it on my new phone. It’s not that I was done dating. No. I mean… Yes, first date over load. but… I still had phone numbers. So I worked off what I call “Tinder Residuals”. So as I went on first dates and crossed guys off the list I was happy to do it a little bit more focused.

I was down to my last few tinder residuals. And just trying to shake a few. But there was one in particular I felt I was connecting with. Great conversation. Extremely interesting. Ambitious. Flirty, but not too flirty. Kept me enthralled. I liked. I had to meet him. So I did. I told myself that no matter how this went I was done with the first-date thing for a bit. If for no other reason but because it was killing my diet.

We met at my go-to first date location. An Irish pub about a mile and a half from my apartment. Something about this place made me less nervous about every meet up. We sat at a different table. I tried to pick a different table every time I went in hopes that the staff wouldn’t recognize me quite as easily… I started getting self conscious about meeting with yet another guy in so short of time. At some point you just have to not care. I probably should just go ahead and friend these people. Get them to rate them as they come in and out… hm…

Anyway, Ryan Tuxedo Cut-off Tinder – who had since graduated to Rayn <insert last name here>. Something about his voice threw me off the first time we spoke on the phone which happened to be minutes till our first meeting. Couldn’t quite decide what I didn’t like about it. But it wasn’t like the guy who I had to ditch because of the super twanginess he put on every single syllable. I decided I’d get use to that. WHAT?! Did I just say that? I made myself smile by talking myself off of that deal breaker. I get there and he’s sitting at the bar. It’s a Tuesday night so there was only about 3 other people there. He was at the bar. Leaner looking than all the selfies I’d seen from him. Guess no one taught him the camera angles that shaves the pounds off. Still. Handsome. Just my type. Tall. Broad shouldered. Naturally strong looking.

I put my phone in my purse and hung my purse on the chair. It was 7:03. We talked. Ordered a few beers. Talked. Ordered food. Talked. Stopped drinking beer. Talked. The conversation was good. Flowed easily. And there was something about this guy. Just under the surface. What was that? Sexiness. That’s it! Why was it hiding? I mean, that made it sexier. I take pride in finding the good in people… but I don’t know that I’ve ever found this in someone unless it was dripping from the surface. He held it in such away that said he was saving it for someone. Keeping it safe for something… for someone special? I made my second date decision right there. It was happening. The time came to wrap up the evening. We (he) paid the bill and we put on our coats. Walked out of the buidling. The building’s entrance is the corner… where a stop light is. I was headed one way and he was headed the opposite. We hugged and said our goodbyes as we waited for the light to turn… that awkward moment of “well, I’ll talk to you soon.” Always hated that. I usually just high tail it in an awkward way because its going to be awkward regardless. We hug again. I walk away reaching in my purse for my phone. 10:57. I hadn’t looked at my phone since putting it away. This made me smile again. I let the possible meanings of this swell in my mind and chest as I unlocked my car door.


couple of Tinder constants

January 27, 2015

26 year old guys are the hottest!!!!! Drool!!!!! but also the group most likely just looking for a booty call… and sending gym pics. Thanks for the bicep shot… but… No, I don’t want to meet up. Feel free to snap chat that sexy self tho! Grrr.

3 out of 5 guys over 30 are at least 30 pounds over their most current picture. Not a deal breaker, but why!?

There are the super nice guys – these guys get lost in the Tinder shuffle because they aren’t exciting enough. They don’t stand out. There the shade of beige amongst the rainbow. Kind of feel bad for this assessment… they are probably the take-home-to-mommy sort of guys.

There’s the overly sexually advances… these get dropped too. Or the crudiest of crude humor… ew. no. go away.

The flirtation guy that keeps it in bounds… these are the meet ups! Not gentlemen, but not NOT gentlemen… These guys get me! THese are the first dates, second dates, and beyond guys.

THe anti-conversationalist… The conversation goes like this:

Him: Hey.

Me: Hi!

Him: Whats up?

Me: Just thinking about whether I want wine, beer, or water!! Decisions!!! (or something equally as silly/lame/enthusiastic but not so generic that the conversation should stop) You?

Him: Nothing much. <—- convo killer. This is when the conversation steers toward “what do you do for a living?” and basically it’s DOA. They might get a meet up, though, but only because there’s always that hope that they just aren’t the texting type. These are the guys that ask for a meet up in the first few messages… they don’t f*ck around… “Lets meet for a drink”… so i know if i can move on with life or not. haha. Um… okay? but… “sure, why not!?” I mean hey! I’m on Tinder for a reason!

There are the pick up line guys… These are friend-zoned immediately. My favorite line, and I got this on two separate ocassions: You are like my apendix. I don’t know anything about you, but I want to take you out. HA!! I once had a 15 minute conversation about ground beef waiting on the punch line that never came. I was stuck in the convo like a moth to a flame. It was sooooo bad I just couldn’t end it. I wanted to see how truly awful it could become. I still chit chat with that guy on facebook at times. He’ll send me random pick up lines just for fun. I would really like to keep this guy around as a friend… but I often forget the sole intent of Tinder when i’ve done the friendzoning and they are still whipping out their best lines. Oh, that’s not just for my entertainment??? my bad! Tip toe quietly and cautiously out the back door.

You will find yourself swiping because of the cute kiddo in a princess dress with the biggest blue eyes (which ironically is probably from her mom and so you swipe right based on his ex??? uhh… I’m weird). Or swiping right for that big ole pup in the second picture! Who’s a good boy!??! You are, yes you are!!! I bet he’s a good cuddler! LOL. Geez. I’m more desperate than I thought!

You’ll get the overt booty call guys that start the convo with “Say you wanna bang.” True story. And then the covert booty call guys. “Hey, do you want to watch some netflix tonight?” RED ALERT! I’m not saying it’s the worst thing to get sucked into, but only if you are both on the same page with it. And safe about it! We’re all grown ups here!

The married guy… Looking for a side chick. At least you are honest about it?? This is the guy with one pic that is not of him… but a great description enough to get the swipe right. Sorry, guy… No can do. Why does this even happen? It’s time to have a talk with the misses. If the sex is bad. if its non existent? I just feel another, more mutually accepted solution can be found here.

The couple looking for a third… I find this completely interesting. They are either looking for a third to add to the relationship or a third for some temporary fun. Hey, if thats what you are into, I won’t judge that! These people are the most honest people on Tinder! Props for that. It’s just not for me!

Love at first swipe happens… draw dropping, gimme the rest of your life profiles… sigh… I want. these are never matches… 😦 So… you Tinder on.

Despite the reputation of Tinder people really do read descriptions. I’ve had a description pull the decision from a left to right on numerous ocassions!

Just some of the Tinder ramblings I promised 🙂 Thanks for reading!

another cuddle sesh post

January 25, 2015

It never ceases to amaze me how appealing the thought of cuddling is with absolute strangers. When on Tinder and talking to guys I’ve never met before… if any of them talked about holding me… i’m swooning. What?? I don’t know this person. I don’t know if i’ll even be okay with most of their mannerisms enough to even stand them… and here i am wishing to be in their arms on the couch/bed watching some netflix. First of all, this is code to them. But to me its a dream! I just want to be touched! but thats why they know it works. Bitches. Manipulative bitches. LOL. Me and other women must not be too different if guys use this and it works? ugh whatever. I’m not saying that I follow thru with all the cuddle threats, but I just wanted to talk about how odd we are as humans to be instantly drawn to this activity with people we know about 150 characters worth. Humans are weird.

Is this need something that we should be substituting with something a bit (mentally) healthier? Or is this just how we are. We are all searching for someone to be in the arms of… and humans just don’t stop till that happens… and some times its taken slightly out of context to more of a temporary fix… but ultimately… is this all this is about? Or am I addicted to something I need rehab from?

First dates and butterflies (or lack thereof)

January 21, 2015

I’ve been on a lot of first dates lately (thank you, Tinder). And there have been some good moments. Neh, great moments! But over all they all lack something. I want to be infatuated. I want to be lost in one thought. I want to be sucked in. I want my heart, chest, and tummy to leap out of my body!

Two reasons I joined tinder. A crazy ass guy I was getting close to showed his full on crazy! TWICE! And this is within the first 2 months of knowing the guy. The level of crazy he showed was definitely a year three kind of crazy.

Second reason: My crush (hopefully more on this subject to come) was dating. and not dating me. He knew I was into him, but he made his no-dating-co-worker policy more than known… so I backed off.

So….. Tinder. I went on 10 first dates and several second and third dates, hell! and a 7th date all in 1 month! These guys only proved entertainment for the moment. None were crazy (or at least hid their crazy appropriately for the first date).

The guys I saw again or deemed worthy to see again were nothing heart stopping. And I want that. I want that so badly. But then I have this voice in the back of my mind saying that’s a feeling only reserved for the 17 year old females falling in love for the first time. 😦 I had that already… maybe I’m not in line for that one anymore.

Tinder is not the way to figure this out. At least not for me. Its just confusing. I went from decent first date to mediocre, nothing-bad-enough-to-say-no-to-a-third-date second date to what-am-i-even-doing-here third date. And a string of non-feelings. Now I’m stuck with a guy (or guys!) that I don’t know how to be mean enough to let go of. Or at least, they didn’t take no the first time. You know, when I did it nicely. Pride sparingly. Just a ton of stress for me. I’m a wuss.

I want the butterflies. And I think I’m going to have to keep searching for that. But another way. Tinder is a great distraction and even better for entertainment. But I definitely would’ve done it differently. Keep people a little farther than i did. lots more thoughts here…. LOTS. and I’ll probably get to it soon.

That’s all for now.

The Tinder Bandwagon

December 31, 2014

I did it. I took the tinder plunge… or should I say, I’m taking it. It’s an odd and fast paced world. It’s overwhelming with too much happening at once to truly process. And I am not the best processor anyway! Before I continue with my observations about this crazy world of swiping I want to preface by referencing an article my friend shared with me recently. Fuck Yes.

The article is summarized by this:

“The Law of “Fuck Yes or No” states that when you want to get involved with someone new, in whatever capacity, they must inspire you to say “Fuck Yes” in order for you to proceed with them.

The Law of “Fuck Yes or No” also states that when you want to get involved with someone new, in whatever capacity, THEY must respond with a “Fuck Yes” in order for you to proceed with them.”

Okay… now lets proceed with my Tinder experience thus far in no particular order.

Ryan: The first “tinder meet up” I went on. I met him in a dive bar about 8pm one friday night… I had been on Tinder for 36 hours. Like I said, Tinder is a fast paced world. If you let it… which was my first mistake. I let it sweep me up and consume my every living moment. No work was done for about a week. But I digress. Ryan…. He was soooooo much cuter than his terribly ambiguous and unfocused pictures. This was a pleasant surprise. Then he smiled. Wide, big, without his usual hand over his mouth. The tops of several of his front teeth were black. BLACK! I hadn’t been close enough to notice the gingivitis/halitosis yet. He said over and over again how good looking I was. And how funny I was. And how much he was liking me…. and here’s the freak out moment: How we were both so lucky to find each other after only being on Tinder for less than a week! Wait, what? Like, lucky to find who? like for good? forever? I wasn’t sure how to respond to this. This man was already IN LOVE! I needed a brown paper bag to breathe into! But my passive aggressive self kept that million dollar smile plastered (that I now knew i had because that’s what gets the swipe rights!). To be honest, I thoroughly enjoyed this man’s company… but who wouldn’t love being so fawned over!? I’m only human. He asked to go back to his place… sigh… It wasn’t a Fuck yes for me… but it was for him….

A side note: I’ve been part of “relationships” where one party was obviously more interested than the other… this never works. EVER. I know that I want to find someone that I can fall mutually for… same rate… same comfortable speed. I don’t believe there is a too fast or too slow when it comes to love but I DO BELIEVE BOTH PARTIES HAVE TO BE ON THE SAME TRAIN!

So unfortunately for Ryan, he showed his cards to soon. Freaked me out. And I high-tailed it!

Matthew: Oh Matthew, you are soooooo cute! I am digging the addition of the beard that wasn’t in your profile pics. LOVE IT! We had pizza and beer on a Sunday night. Good conversation flow. Good vibes-ish. But it wasn’t til we were leaving the building that I realized he was shorter than me just by a SMIDGE! :*( The hug sealed his coffin… I had to bend down and i was in flat boots.

Rodney: RODNEY! WTF how did you even score this date?! Rodney is so cocky and full of himself… or at least that’s how he first comes across. I see him through this tho. And there’s something there. Something about the way our humor meshes together so fluidly. Turns out he’s a rich guy. Our first date consisted of his corvette, valet, 5 over $30 entrees, drinks at a fancy hotel bar downtown. SO MUCH FUN! He actually translated the most perfect from the medium of text to real life. I felt like I already knew the inflections of his words and all his sarcastic slants. It was great! He was about 60 pounds up from his heaviest profile pic. I don’t get caught up in weight. I struggle too much myself with this demon. I’m about 30 lbs over weight at any given moment. So this is not a deal breaker…. It would’ve been nice to fit the face of the person I was falling into like with thru text to the face that actually existed in real life tho. Rodney is still around. We’ve been on 4 dates now. “Date” is too big of a word tho. a lunch. a Netflix movie. We get along well. He asked me to go to vegas with him for the new years… Work prevented this from being a possibility… otherwise I have no idea if I would have actually let myself indulge in something so frivolous and spontaneous. Neither are my nature. BUT SERIOUSLY?!?! How awesome and cool! well… except that I actually hate this kind of show-off-ery. To me its too much. Too over the top. Shania Twain said it best. “That don’t impress-a me much!” Here’s the thing about Rodney: It’s not a fuck yes. It isn’t. And I hate that. This guy is the perfect gentleman. After four dates all he’s ventured to take is a chaste kiss on the lips. This is a different speed than I’m use to. And I don’t know really how I feel about it. I suppose its nice… Yet, makes me wonder if he’s a fuck yes or not…. Of course if he was dragging me to the bedroom I’d hate that too… YOU CANNOT WIN WITH US WOMEN!

Within the first week I had had 3 dates and i had been stood up for 2 others. I was a busy girl! And honestly… being stood up like this wasn’t that bad. In this age of technology it is no longer necessary to show up to the place intended in order to be stood up… It’s pretty convenient to know you are being stood up when there is zero response to the “hey are we still on for tonight?” text. So I was kind of happy with the accidental night in! And I had so many other guys matching and chatting that it had no effect on my self esteem. Besides not being bummed about something that would’ve normally taken me into a downward spiral for a few days – another Tinder phenomenon was happening… It was so much easier to be myself with all these options. If someone had an issue with something about me it was “NEXT!” for the both of us. No skin off anyone’s back. I am able to be myself! Soooooo freely myself. No over thinking. Just chatting… being honest… moving right along.

AJ: The Dominate. This is a secret I’ve carried around for a short time… I’m a slight closet masochist! No, we were never intimate, but holy moly was i attracted to this guy! The first time he kissed me he put his hand around my throat… I was in heaven (ironically). But, still, I’m not looking for a hook up here… I want a relationship. No matter how much I want to explore this world and test the limits, I have my priorities… most of the time. Despite how much I wanted to experiment with a little d/s… he didn’t cut it in the fuck yes department outside of the bedroom. I felt the most comfortable with AJ tho. I wonder if its because we shared this secret?

Ian: The one guy I told directly that I do not want a hook up, but sure you can bring over some beer and we can watch a movie! Whoops. Lesson learned there. Next.

Josh – The Gentleman: This guy… never crossed any of the flirting lines yet still made it past the “what do you do for a living?” awkward first conversations. Too bad for Josh tho. He has had a run of bad luck lately and I just can’t bring myself to want to be part of that world. Ex wife. Recent ex fiance. Two kids from two different women… I don’t consider his divorce or kids the bad luck he’s run into… not at all. But this guy has 3 DWIs, had to move in with his parents when his fiance kicked him and the kids out… And he is currently getting over pneumonia. You are nice… and not bad looking (another welcomed surprise of being cuter than your profile pictures)… but… its not a fuck yes. His eyes, they are so good. He’s a good guy. Unlucky. But I can tell… he’s one of the good ones. and probably this fact is what directly contributes to his bad luck with women. Poor Josh.

Josh II: This guy. I chatted with this guy for a week. He’s fun. He loves people. He’s laid back. Decent job. Great flowing fun text conversations. Not a whole whole lot in common but nothing un-reconcilable. Good looking. but… He had an unforgivable feminine giggle that there is no way I’d ever be able to get over. SIgh…. call be picky… but its no fuck yes.

More Tinder ramblings to come!

a few thoughts

September 30, 2014

I haven’t posted in a bit. All the topics that come to mind are so…. desperate sounding. And I don’t feel desperate.

1) I hope i can be a better wife to someone one day than I was the first go round.

2) not one day goes by that I don’t think of having someone new in my life… my love life, specifically…

3) To Tinder or not to Tinder…

4) I hate feeling so terrible at my job… but i’m new at it… so its okay to feel this way?

5) I wanna go to a bar and play “Haaaaave you met Ted?”

that’s all.