Posts Tagged ‘booty call’

closure

October 6, 2016

So…. mitch called me last week. He said he wanted to start thinking about us maybe sort of getting back together. Vague as shit, right? But… you guys know what I went through. I couldn’t just say no and hang up. It wasn’t just my curiosity that made me say “Yeah, we could talk about that.”

Two days later he texted me and said he was on his way to Little Rock. He had friends to catch up with and he wanted to meet up with me too. Whao.. I haven’t seen from this guy since March and he wants to get things going again AAAAANNNNDDD HE’S ON HIS WAY TO ME???

I didn’t know how to feel. It’s like my feelings short circuited and shut down.

“Okay, yeah. We can do dinner.” Whats the harm in that?

He picks me up. He walks up to me and hugs me and kisses me. Kisses me like he owns me. I’m hesitant, but my reflexes were too slooooow and I kissed back, but it felt all wrong.

It wasn’t til I was sitting across the table from man that I realized just how much anger I have for him. I am so so so so so mad! How could he do what he did? He’ll never understand what shape he left me in. NEVER. I’m sure that forgiveness isn’t impossible, but it surely wasn’t today. We had our meal and I tried my best not to talk about the break up and just talk about us now. And what he was thinking and about his expectations and such.

When I said the word expectations all he answered was that he expected we would have sex tonight (Sunday night). I was a little taken aback as I was referring about how he thought we were going to pick up a relationship long distance and if he expected us to be exclusive or what level of commitment he was sitting on. Um… sex? Tonight? Really? Like, sex with mitch was fantastic, don’t get me wrong. And this week I have been in a MOOD! But… it couldn’t have been more of a turn off. I quickly set him straight on the issue. That I’m unsure of where I stand on the boundary front, but that I wouldn’t expect sex tonight if I were him.

As we were making our way back to my apartment he puts his hand on my boob and tries to start rubbing. I throw his hand off. And he said “what’s wrong babe?” “I’m just not sure about all that. I haven’t seen you since march WHEN YOU BROKE UP WITH ME.” Then he puts his hand on my crotch. I yell “NO” as forcefully and summoning as much authority as possible. And you all know about my submissive when it comes to men, especially lovers (ex or not). I had to dig deep for this, but I was amazed at his forwardness.

He drops me off saying he has committed some time to his old roommate while he’s in town and asks if he can come back later that evening. I tell him it just depends on how late it was… it being a school night at all. I know it hasn’t gone well this far, but I wouldn’t mind another conversation before he leaves town again.

It isn’t til 10 that he asks when is “too late.” At 10:30 I head to bed and I tell him this much. “So… I can’t come over?” “Goodnight.” Eye roll. I’m kind of mad at this point. Don’t tell me you are coming back and then expect me to stay up for you. No sir.

THe next day I don’t hear from him til the evening. He asks if he can stay the night… but it won’t be til late. More committed time to another buddy in a town about an hour away. I said he could… I’m still wanting that conversation.

He doesn’t come in til 11pm tho. I know at this point a productive conversation is impossible. He tries his handsy shit again, and I have to tell him to quit being so pushy.

I felt like the whole weekend was one big booty call. It made me feel shitty. He never once made me feel respected, valued, or cared for… That from the guy that says he wants to try a relationship again?

All I can say is WOW and thank you mitch for the closure.

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couple of Tinder constants

January 27, 2015

26 year old guys are the hottest!!!!! Drool!!!!! but also the group most likely just looking for a booty call… and sending gym pics. Thanks for the bicep shot… but… No, I don’t want to meet up. Feel free to snap chat that sexy self tho! Grrr.

3 out of 5 guys over 30 are at least 30 pounds over their most current picture. Not a deal breaker, but why!?

There are the super nice guys – these guys get lost in the Tinder shuffle because they aren’t exciting enough. They don’t stand out. There the shade of beige amongst the rainbow. Kind of feel bad for this assessment… they are probably the take-home-to-mommy sort of guys.

There’s the overly sexually advances… these get dropped too. Or the crudiest of crude humor… ew. no. go away.

The flirtation guy that keeps it in bounds… these are the meet ups! Not gentlemen, but not NOT gentlemen… These guys get me! THese are the first dates, second dates, and beyond guys.

THe anti-conversationalist… The conversation goes like this:

Him: Hey.

Me: Hi!

Him: Whats up?

Me: Just thinking about whether I want wine, beer, or water!! Decisions!!! (or something equally as silly/lame/enthusiastic but not so generic that the conversation should stop) You?

Him: Nothing much. <—- convo killer. This is when the conversation steers toward “what do you do for a living?” and basically it’s DOA. They might get a meet up, though, but only because there’s always that hope that they just aren’t the texting type. These are the guys that ask for a meet up in the first few messages… they don’t f*ck around… “Lets meet for a drink”… so i know if i can move on with life or not. haha. Um… okay? but… “sure, why not!?” I mean hey! I’m on Tinder for a reason!

There are the pick up line guys… These are friend-zoned immediately. My favorite line, and I got this on two separate ocassions: You are like my apendix. I don’t know anything about you, but I want to take you out. HA!! I once had a 15 minute conversation about ground beef waiting on the punch line that never came. I was stuck in the convo like a moth to a flame. It was sooooo bad I just couldn’t end it. I wanted to see how truly awful it could become. I still chit chat with that guy on facebook at times. He’ll send me random pick up lines just for fun. I would really like to keep this guy around as a friend… but I often forget the sole intent of Tinder when i’ve done the friendzoning and they are still whipping out their best lines. Oh, that’s not just for my entertainment??? my bad! Tip toe quietly and cautiously out the back door.

You will find yourself swiping because of the cute kiddo in a princess dress with the biggest blue eyes (which ironically is probably from her mom and so you swipe right based on his ex??? uhh… I’m weird). Or swiping right for that big ole pup in the second picture! Who’s a good boy!??! You are, yes you are!!! I bet he’s a good cuddler! LOL. Geez. I’m more desperate than I thought!

You’ll get the overt booty call guys that start the convo with “Say you wanna bang.” True story. And then the covert booty call guys. “Hey, do you want to watch some netflix tonight?” RED ALERT! I’m not saying it’s the worst thing to get sucked into, but only if you are both on the same page with it. And safe about it! We’re all grown ups here!

The married guy… Looking for a side chick. At least you are honest about it?? This is the guy with one pic that is not of him… but a great description enough to get the swipe right. Sorry, guy… No can do. Why does this even happen? It’s time to have a talk with the misses. If the sex is bad. if its non existent? I just feel another, more mutually accepted solution can be found here.

The couple looking for a third… I find this completely interesting. They are either looking for a third to add to the relationship or a third for some temporary fun. Hey, if thats what you are into, I won’t judge that! These people are the most honest people on Tinder! Props for that. It’s just not for me!

Love at first swipe happens… draw dropping, gimme the rest of your life profiles… sigh… I want. these are never matches… 😦 So… you Tinder on.

Despite the reputation of Tinder people really do read descriptions. I’ve had a description pull the decision from a left to right on numerous ocassions!

Just some of the Tinder ramblings I promised 🙂 Thanks for reading!