being a grown-up

actual conversation with a co-worker

co-worker: do you have something sharp?  knife?

me: i have a butter knife and some scissors.

co-worker: sharp

me: what’s this for?

co-worker: digging out a splinter

me: nail clippers?

coworker:  …

me: i can’t help you

coworker (minutes later): got it

me: woot. let’s celebrate. with a nap.

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