Me and my girlfriends were talking about dreams last night. One of my friends says she has a recurring theme of snow in the fall. My other friend has dreams she can’t move but there are dark figured men walking around her room… they are in different positions depending on the position of her body. Mine is a silly recurring dream I’ve had since I was 4. Flesh colored alligators with yarn for hair, not unlike a kid’s puppet… It was terrifying to my 4 year old self… and truth be told when I have the dream today it is as if i’m 4 all over again and just as terrified… the dream always ends with me desperately trying to scream for my parents but nothing comes out.

We had fun looking up the themes and guessing what they could mean… Snow having something to do with unspoken emotions… which is extremely fitting for my friend who can’t/won’t talk about feelings… she’s embarrassed that she actually has all the same girly instincts as the rest of us. It’s funny.

Alligators symbolize treachery, deceit, and hidden instincts… whatever that means. But it does also say that I might need to take a new perspective on something going on in my life…. Just what I need – over thinking and dissecting what situation I need a perspective change… Wonder how the meaning is effected when its an alligator that looks like an art project gone wrong?

It’s kind of fun… Think about a dream you’ve had multiple times.. or maybe just the last one you can think of… It’s the same kind of a fun a horoscope can be when you aren’t sold out to it. http://www.dreammoods.com/dreamdictionary/a.htm

Anyway, I went home on my lunch break to take a little siesta… I had a dream. Me and my ex were parking at Kroger. As we walked through the parking lot we held hands. As naturally as it was to hold hands, I felt like something was off. It wasn’t til after we walked through the automatic doors that I realized we weren’t together and yanked my hand back. “Wondered how long that would last.” My realization came in layers… Like I had to swim through the degrees of separation we went through to get to our divorce. Didn’t we separate? Are we working things out? Wait, I have my own place. Whoa! We’re divorced!

I’m not one to remember when I actually dream so I thought it an odd coincidence that I had this dream after we talked about it just last night. I’m not looking up what it means to dream of an ex.

Shaking it off.


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